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Career over Love Any day

December 8, 2010
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When reading Mill for PoliSci, I couldn’t help but think of a CNN Article that I read for my English class. The Article was called “Young Women Choosing Careers over Love” and the title pretty much sums up the entire article. The stereotype that women are more likely than men to put career goals below family and romantic relationships is pretty much shot down in this article.

“Though I’m not planning on breaking up with my boyfriend, I’m leaving him behind in Ohio. It’s hard to get your foot in the door of the field I want to work in. And let’s face it: Nowadays you have to cover your butt if you want to make it anywhere.” – Olga Boyko, 23

More and more young women are focusing on their career and life rather than marriage and children. I believe that Mill would definitely agree with this new phenomenon especially because he thought that education and liberation of women would benefit women in tremendous ways.

“The power of earning is essential to the dignity of a woman, if she has not independent property.” –John Stuart Mill

If a man marries an educated woman then they can have a better more intellectual relationship according to Mill. Clearly many women have caught on to that concept also. They have decided to put themselves in the same playing field as men and are deciding to get married later and have children later also.

A housewife gives her husband and children cake

“For men, romance, then marriage, then children may be unlikely to lead to the interruption of their career. For women, having children is likely to be more disruptive to their career.

”-Psychologist Ellen Klosson

It is interesting to note that as a result of women putting their careers first there is actually a shift in roles which is resulting in men putting their relationships first. This is due to the fact that there is now less pressure for men to put their careers first freeing up room for them to put other things such as marriage first. Many women such as Olga Boyko are okay with the shifting roles.

Honestly, if he said, ‘Stay and wait for me to finish, or it’s over,’ I’d start packing early.”

I believe that Mill would be very pleased with the elevation of women not only within the home but also outside of the home.

More women have college degrees or higher

10 Comments
  1. Jessie Altman permalink
    December 8, 2010 10:38 PM

    Today there are more women pursuing careers and having jobs outside of the home. However, there has also been evidence of a “second shift” in the home. This means that after they go to the office they come home to housework and childcare. While women seem to be working around the clock, men come home to relaxation. So while Mill would be happy that women are working more, I think he would not like the idea that while men get time to relax and get ready for their next workday, women continue to work. This inequality in housework might result in inequality in the workplace — men returning the next day well rested and women coming in fatigued and not performing at their full potential.

  2. tanoodle permalink
    December 8, 2010 11:19 PM

    This article brings up a lot of my own internal issues. Even though I’m only a sophomore, my friends and I often discuss our future career/family plans (even those us us who don’t have a boyfriend!). In these conversations, I often find myself having to choose between a career and family, and as much as it depresses AND excites me, I sort of end up choosing the career. At least in my case, the article you mention is spot-on for the moment. I always tell myself maybe it will change as I grow older, but career seems far more important to me than anything. Maybe I’ll be one of those women who can juggle both her fabulous career and her family. As traditional as it seems, and despite my career goals, I WANT to be that mother who picks the kids up from school and cooks her family dinner (as long as my husband does the dishes!)

    As for Mill, I think he would definitely be excited by how much women are working. They are proving their ability to the world and are finding way to cultivate themselves as individuals. He would be pleases by our progress.

  3. lrib12 permalink
    December 8, 2010 11:30 PM

    I feel Mill would not be accepting of the fact that men have this free time. Yes he would be happy that women are able to get out and work but the expense of changing the equilibrium wouldn’t go over well. men would have more relax time as women would then essentially have extra time

  4. kdburdet permalink
    December 8, 2010 11:49 PM

    Mill would probably be jumping with joy if he had heard about women putting their careers first. mill believes that it is important for women to focus on their work in order to become successful. I find in interesting how you first read a CNN article and that is what caused you to decide to write on this topic. You said that men get more time to relax and women hurry to their jobs and take care of a lot of things. in this aspect, mill would not be very pleased in how women have taken on more of a workload while leaving less to the men. I can see your logic behind men putting their relationships first because women are putting jobs first and relationships second. I’m not sure how long this trend is going to continue, but the logic makes sense. Mill would be proud of how far women have come and would be proud of their success.

  5. darriensherman permalink
    December 9, 2010 12:32 AM

    I would definitely have to agree with you that Mill would be proud that more women are being accepted into the workforce. It is interesting to note that our culture places both career and family responsibilities on the woman. While it is a great accomplishment that women are dominating the workforce, it is important for women to maintain a balance between her career and her relationships. I think Mill would agree that careers and relationships should not have to be an ultimatum. What makes life worth living is having a career but also having relationships to share your wealth of knowledge.
    I am a sophomore and with major declarations coming around the corner, I really do take into consideration a career that would allow me to spend time with my family. I know its way down the road, but I can’t help but think about the logistics- the hours, location, vacations, etc. and how this will affect my relationships and family.

  6. arimark91 permalink
    December 9, 2010 12:41 AM

    I agree that Mill would be pleased with the fact that more women are entering the workforce. Still, I believe that he would not be fully satisfied, seeing as men do still dominate most high-level jobs. Also, he would not necessarily want men to suddenly do all the housework and women to be the money earners, he’d just want it to be equal and for everyone to have a fair opportunity at getting what he or she wants. Also, I wonder if Burke would be happy about this. He’s all about tradition and women leaving their tradition roles as housewives might not please him.

  7. Benjamin Di Pietro permalink
    December 9, 2010 12:57 AM

    Whether or not everything i actually equal in these ways, aren’t Mills ideals more about the options? In which case, present day seems to grant nearly equal opportunity. Although i know this can be easily countered, we are moving far in the right direction exponentially.

  8. mbhilton permalink
    December 9, 2010 12:59 PM

    I just want to say that as a man, I actually prefer the idea of a well educated intellectual woman becoming my wife rather than essentially having a glorified maid. Marriage for me means chosing to share your life with someone and that’s impossible if you’re not on equal footing.

  9. December 9, 2010 3:51 PM

    I agree, along with nearly every other comment, that Mill would indeed feel good knowing women are really putting themselves out there and breaking the stereotypical mold that women have followed for most of, forever.
    I do agree with one of the other comments, that while making a name for yourself in the workplace and being able to support yourself is important, money doesn’t buy happiness. There must be a balance between your work life, and your home life. I’m not saying that a woman NEEDS a significant other to be happy, but in most cases, a job can’t bring you the compassion or loyalty or love that another person close to you can.
    So yes, Mill would be happy, and feminists would be as well; but is this really the only thing women should be focusing on?

  10. Christine Irish permalink
    December 9, 2010 11:46 PM

    I think the idea that CNN would even run an article with that title is somewhat sexist in itself. Think about it if it were turned around. I highly doubt that the article “Young Men are Choosing Careers Over Love” would make headlines, or even be read, because most people probably wouldn’t find that surprising. So, if it’s okay for men to choose careers over love, why does it make headlines when women do the same? It’s because today’s gender norms still enforce the idea that a woman’s priority should be finding love and having a family. Another thing that I dislike about the premise of the article is that it assumes that one must be chosen over the other. My mom works and is still there to love and care for her family. She works hard, but she never had to choose between the two.

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